Correction de fautes pour un devoir d'anglais
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  1. #1
    Elève touriste
    Date d'inscription
    août 2010

    Par défaut Correction de fautes pour un devoir d'anglais

    j'ai un long devoir d'anglais à rendre avec plusieurs questions. Quelqu'un pourrait il me dire les fautes à corriger. En vous remerciant par avance.

    • Part one.
      Summarise the section in French. Comment on the ideas expressed in this article. How do you see language? Is there a causal relationship between language mastery, or education and reasoning, thought? (120 150 words /10%).

    A Wikipedia version is in simple English, an English with less than thousands words for the children or the adults who are difficulties for learning or not mastering a subject, or doing something else in same time. There are since long time simplified languages as the simple English used in the aeronautics industries or the plain English for US administration or the Global English. Furthermore, the emission “voice of America” is also in simplified English in slow flow. Georges Orwell with novlangue, with his novel 1984, explains how the simplification of a langue aims to reduce the thought. The words are made for express something. All the shade of a meaning can express different feelings. A langue is reflexion of our mind. Langue can spread idea at many people. It can share the history and science. Our knowledge is based on it. If we destroy the words we destroy our world.

    • Part two. Do you think brainwashing is a real threat in today's violent world? Argue for or against the notion of 'free will', which underlies the principle of the 'individual'.

    The brainwashing aims to recondition the “free will” of the “individual” in the order to bring him to do a pre-determined action. We can say we are all under a brainwashing and the problematic is to know if it is a threat in today’s violent word. We can answer with the affirmative by looking in first how work the sects, then how war use it. Finally we will discuss the education role and media in the processes of brainwashing.

    First of all, the sects are a threat for individual because their functioning is based on the brainwashing. They use it for bring individual to adhere at an ideology. It‘s easier to watch the brain of a person who is weak but we have also seen social stable people trapped by sects. Therefore it is a physiological process based on mind control. The aim is usually financial because the sects dispossess their devoted, but can also be sometime violent. The solar temple is the concrete example with suicide collective of these members in several countries where this sect was present. We can see the “free will” can be wrecked and lead at extreme situation like death here. We see the process of brainwashing on a little group but it can also apply for a large-scale in the case of totalitarian regime or dictatorial.

    Indeed, in totalitarian regime, the brainwashing is often used for the war and always exists in Africa with child soldiers. In the past the Hitler youth regimented the children at the youngest age to inculcate them Nazi doctrine. This manipulation prepared them to combat for party ideas. Therefore we can see the mass brainwashing can bring regimes to erase the “free will” of people in the aim to obtain what we want
    from them.

    Finally, reaching at the conditions of extreme totalitarian regime or sects, it’s sure that our “free will” is linked at our knowledge of the world, linked itself at our education and at the medias. The education is one wanted by a government through official program and media is often time the reference but we can see more and more superficial emission take the place of news and cultural emission. Then we are more or less directed in our “free will”. Although, we often take for
    responsible the media for explain violent behaviour of people. We can go
    thought in this discuss and every body is aware for preserve our modern consumer society we need more and more resources in particular with oil and we are ready to accept the war to continue to benefit of our lifestyle. We are all actors and responsible of this violent world.

    For conclude, we have seen that the brainwashing can take multiple shapes but for the victims of the brainwash the threat doesn’t exists anymore since they are not aware of this. Does the “free will” really exist? It seems we are linked at our environment.

    • Comment on the 1984 excerpt. What is Sym's argument? How does Winston react? Do you think he agrees?

    This excerpt details what is the eleven edition of the novlangue. It’s an update of the old langue but with the particularly to destroy words. In first hand, we will see how Sym defends the merits of the novlangue and in another hand how Winstom seems to be doubtful.

    Sym thinks that the destruction of the words reduce the though. It’s the perfect weapon of the government for fight the crime by thought. We can see he is passionate by his work. His work consists to erase some words of the langue and changes some sense by other. He explains how we can loose the mean of a word. The solution for express an opposite word is to change the word with a negation like good and
    “ungood”. He says the word “bad” is not appropriated. Ungood is clear and just the opposite. Following this way he introduces new word like “plusgood or doubleplusgood” corresponding to excellent or splendid. The final langue will contain only one word for these 3 words. When he speaks it’s like this langue is ever official and the old langue is called “Oldspeak”.“Oldspeak” is “vagueness” and “useless shades of meaning”. He is really satisfied when he says “newspeak”, the langue he is writing, is the only one langue where the vocabulary gets smaller every year. He admits this langue aims to “narrow range of thought” and will not allow “thoughtcrime” (a thoughcrime is a thought against government or simply a thought in 1984). By reducing words we will not be able to express a crime so it will be impossible to commit he says. In the future this process will continue for let the “range of consciousness always a
    little smaller”. In the future nobody will understand the langue they are
    speaking today.

    Winston is really doubtful and no enthusiast about changing the langue by destruction words. Winston uses again the “oldspeak”, the langue before newspeak, and proves his lack of motivation for change. Before we ever can see that all subjects seems not interest him. He tries to avoid almost every subject like the event of the war or what the government is doing. He doesn’t go to the hanging that is really show he is not following all this. He realize a little “though crime” when he says he has not blade. The conclusion of Winston let us think he is ready to say something that could be a bigger though crime and it strengthens the vision of someone who really doesn’t believe in the novlangue and in what the government is doing.

    In this excerpt we have see how the langue is important to express a thought and how control a langue allows control a mind. We have 2 opposite points of view. One mind is approving the totalitarian regime and he is smart for see how the destruction word reduce the thought and other seems really not enthusiast with all this.

    • What problems does this short article raise and how does Tim BernersLee propose to remedy these?

    This article raises three problems linked at the web. Firstly, we approach the problem of disinformation then we see how the internet access is a problem in some area, finally we will say why the web is not democratic. We will describe the Time Bernars Lee solutions for these problems.

    The first problem is the disinformation on the web. Sir Tim wants to propose a trustworthiness web and for this he proposes a labelling which could insure the sources are reliable. The simple ratio we can find usually is not enough for a web branding. He prefers opinions of different organisations which could define these labels.

    The second problem is the internet access in rural zone and also in Africa because classical infrastructure doesn’t exist. He brings the solution with his Foundation which aims to develop the same services
    but with the mobile phone.

    The third problem is the no democratic web. His Foundation will see in the future how bring easy access for people who cannot read or write and also how the web can stay neutral and forbid personal interest of private company.

    This article has approached three problems and gives the solutions of Tim Bernard Lee for help people to have a better web.

    • Comment on any issue you find interesting here. (150 words ou 10%)

    There are several aspects at the problem of disinformation. First of all, I will explain how disinformation can be widespread. Secondly I will show how we can use disinformation for change the reality.

    The internet is becoming the vector for information. Every body can have this technology and share any kind of information without any control. For example many website relate supernatural event but in fact it is easy to change a picture for try to let you know an UFO is in the sky.

    Disinformation can change real event or transform the reality. I have seen recently a film named “zeitgeist” available on the net. It is really scaring because it shows another reality for the 11 September but I think we can’t conclude anything since there is so many information and each one should be more detailed.

    It would appear then that we should really care about disinformation and the idea of Tim BernersLee to labelling website is a good plan.

  2. #2
    Date d'inscription
    septembre 2007
    25 402
    Billets dans le blog

    Par défaut

    Bonjour Alexandre et bienvenue sur Be-Students.

    J'espère que notre professeur d'anglais (Papy84) saura t'aider à temps car il est peut-être en vacances. C'est à rendre pour quand ?
    Satisfait de Be-Students ? Clique sur l'image pour rejoindre notre groupe sur Facebook afin de nous promouvoir sur internet:

  3. #3
    Elève touriste
    Date d'inscription
    août 2010

    Par défaut


    Ne vous inquiétez ce n'est pas pressé j'ai un ami qui va corriger pour moi mais merci quand même.

  4. #4
    Professeur de langues
    Date d'inscription
    septembre 2010

    Par défaut

    Ben pourquoi tu le mets ici si un ami corrige pour toi ?

    Bon si au bout d'un mois tu as toujours besoin de qqn pour ce texte, fais-moi signe (oui je ne le fais pas maintenant au cas où le texte ait déjà été corrigé)
    Dernière modification par clarichou ; 08/09/2010 à 15h14.



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