Discussion: Petite rédaction
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Vieux 20/01/2008, 12h26   #1
Dj-dj67
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Petite rédaction

Bonjour à tous, voilà je suis élève de seconde, pas très bon en anglais, et je viens d'écrire une rédaction, et j'aimerais donc si cela est possible, que quelqu'un me corrige les fautes (car il doit y en avoir !) ^^

Donc le tout début nous a été donné, avec quelques fautes que nous devons corriger, puis la suite laisse libre court à notre imagination ^^

Je vous demanderais donc de ne pas trop juger l'histoire en elle-même
Pour résumer, c'est l"histoire d'un jeune adolescent qui rêve de devenir cow-boy et qui donc quitte sa maison.


Dear Mom and Dad,
Hi sisters,

I know I should have written sooner...
I suppose you were very worried, especially Mother. I'm really very sorry and I hope you'll forgive me. But let me tell you what's happened since I left you, and I'm sure you'll understand...
(le texte ci-dessus est le début donné)
During these six weeks spent in the West, I lived many awful days but also many amazing days. The first day I crossed the border, and some minutes later, a group of bandits attacked me and had stolen Dad's forty dollars. Then I was brings down and I didn't think more than come home. This idea was plenty of shame, and that's why I was strong-minded to continue my journey.
In the same day, I was affected again !
How is the life dangerous in West !
Four people approached and one of them ordered me to give them my propertys. I recognized them! It's was the Daltons ! I was affraid but I was also very exciting!
As I didn't answer, Joe Dalton unsheathed, but at this moment Lucky Luke was appeared!
How lucky I was ! He saved me and attached the Daltons. After this, we were going to the nearest city in order to rest.
When I wake-up, I found a purse of money on the table with a paper on which was written << To have help me>>.
I rushed out of the esthablishment but I didn't see him, it was to late !
Finally I decided to relax me in the Hotel's jacuzzi.
Since, I'm known under the name << the one who helped Lucky luke>> in all the West, and that's why mi life is now so attractive but also very dangerous.
I haven't already reach my goal, I'm not still a cow-boy.

I love you so much!
Ross.
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